adryazad.com
my thoughts, my creations, and what not….

i was nearly reaching home when i saw the fallen motorcyclist. I never liked motorcyclist who sped on the roads like they owned it, and yes i do curse at those who almost got me into accidents. anyway getting back to the story. i was driving down the main road heading towards my house, when i saw a person in red sprawled on the street. his motorcycle looked battered from the fall. i recognised the red shirt he was wearing in an instant, he was a McDelivery rider.  he got up, and looked shocked from the fall, limping whilst picking up his belongings on the street.

so many cars were turning out of the intersection. there was a dark coloured cefiro, and a champagne coloured lexus. each of them turned out, STOPPED and STARRED for a moment and proceeded to drive off. I pushed on the throttle a little harder and made a U-ey. Parked my car and got down. Thankfully, another malay chap in a satria pulled up just as i was parking my car, and helped him out. The kind hearted malay chap then picked up the motorcycle and pushed it to the side of the road.

ada lock tak? nak kunci motor ko.. karang kena curi  he asked the McDelivery dude.

takpe takpe.. biar aja..  was the reply

The dude really looked shaken, and i don’t blame him. i’ve been in accidents before, he was groaning and limping. i scanned his body and saw that he wasn’t seriously injured or anything. thank god he was wearing a helmet.

hang ok tak? i asked

ok ok…  he answered while limping.

kind hearted malay chap helped him into the satria…

nak gi mana ni? klinik? i asked the kind hearted malay chap

tak tak.. nak hantar dia pi cari kawan dia.. ko jaga motor dia eh? 

i just nodded and off they went.

i sat on my car boot waiting, and my left hand clutched on to a wooden club (well yeah, gotta be ready if anything happens right? i have first hand experience being hounded by hooligan who lobbed helmets at me once). I started to wonder, what happened to people these days? how can you see a sprawled human being on the cold hard surface, in pain? while you sit in your air-conditioned luxury car. and instead of getting down to help the poor soul, you stop, stare a while and just drive off? What if he was unconscious? what if while in a daze and not realising his surrounding, the person on the road got hit by a speeding car because he was unaware of what was happening due to the state of shock he was in? the list of what if’s could go on and on… but the one act of stopping and helping him would put a halt to all the possibilities.

maybe i’m just being emo thinking about it, but i think i’m feeling disappointed instead. how would you like to be in a similar situation, and noone even bothered to lend a hand?

about 10 minutes of waiting, a motorbike with two guys showed up.. and what happened next was traumatising… one of them pulled out a knife and told me to go home.. while he stole the abandoned motorcycle… thank god i got away with it with no bodily harm.. ok that was a joke..

anyway 10 minutes of waiting, 2 guys showed up on a bike with their McD’s shirts on. I asked them how he was, and they said he was fine.. and asked me what happened and how did he get into the accident. I told them i didn’t know because i wasn’t there to witness it happening and that all i saw was him on the road. they said their thank you’s and left with the bike.

i left the scene with something to think about…

i’m not known to churn out entries after entries after entries, in fact, looking back i don’t think i post that regularly anyway. but until recent, i feel that i’ve had too much on my plate to clear… with my new found schedule which i find hard to keep to, more often then not i find myself too lethargic to squeeze a post or two at the end of the day. work has been really good lately, been busy doing some drawings and stuff for submission, and after work its either badminton, or badminton or futsal or maybe hit the gym a little. with all these activities, i can’t believe that i still fall asleep at only 4am EVERYDAY. and eventually, i wake up regretting that i slept at 4am and promise myself i’ll sleep earlier tonight. but that never happens. heh.. wow such discipline dree.. bravo.

on a separate note, i was at the lobby of my office the other day. and the lobby where i work at is manned by an indian chap who’s probably in his 50’s and another dude from Nepal. i’d guess that he’s in his 20s or so. I was downstairs for a smoke by the handrails and there the dude from nepal was standing beside me.

so, how’s things ? i asked

ok laa.. everyday people come park here, they say 5 minutes, but they park here few hours. then one car go, another one come. *in a thick indian-y accent

*think dree… think what else to talk to him about… damn you suck at small talk*

sooo… back hom in nepal you got how many brother and sister? that was the best thing i could figure out to ask

ooh, i have 1 younger brother.. ( he goes on saying something about 2 years old or something like that)

wah.. 2 years old… what is he doing there la?

he’s in the indian army.. my father also indian army last time.. 

(muka malu la.. sebab dia cakap dua tahun lagi muda tapi kepala biul aku ni dok pikir yang adik dia umur dua tahun la pulak kan?)

oh then how come you never join the army also? why come here work as a security guard? i asked again

i went for the training and go for exams. i passed everything, shooting, marching, the physical. but then, when i go the medical check up, the doctor say my health very good, but i cannot join the army because of my face. (points as his fairly visible scare which was probably from a fire or something). the doctor say, because of my scare, maybe i cannot work in cold place, because very easily affected. nepal dood said

i see.. hey.. i’ve got to go back up to the 10th floor…see you later ya 

thankfully my cigarette finished by then, because i didn’t know what to say to him.

the conversation definitely spurred some thoughts. at first i began to wonder how much a soldier makes in nepal, then compare it to how much he’s probably making here working as a security guard. if he was in the army, at least he’d be home with his family, but due to the slightly disfigured face, he’s here.. in malaysia. probably earning meagre pay trying to make ends meet and everyday after work, he goes back to a room shared with 6 other people. and the next day the whole routine repeats itself.

i guess its a little true.. when my dad used to tell me that we can’t have everything, instead we make do with what we have. he told me that when i realised i wasn’t going to be able to do my degree in the UK due to the shortage of funds. i was sad, broken hearted, and bitter. i begged MARA, who turned me away, because apparently they don’t send ART students overseas for degrees. i wanted to take a bank loan, but it was a little too much to put the house as a collateral.. JUST FOR ME.. so i didn’t go. did my degree locally instead. got a ptptn loan to finance it. and looking back now, i guess it was a blessing in disguise. i would have never met the people whom have put much colour in my life, but most of all, if i did take a loan to head to the UK. i would be slaving just to pay back the loan ammount. haha..

so its true when people say ‘if life throws you lemons, you make lemonade’. but you know what.. i’d rather life throw me apples.. then i’de make the apple pie i used to make.. and give it to all you guys that matter.

apologies to those whom i’ve wronged lately. you know who you are. 

nothing really out of the ordinary happened this week. today started off late as i only woke up at around 4pm after a hard night out with my colleagues. had some ‘breakfast’ and headed to One Utama to get my oakleys replaced. people often ask me why i only wear oakleys.. and my answer is always the same. they make good sunglasses and whats even better? the service of course. i bought myself a pair of oakleys after losing the M-Frame pro’s during the Chamang Waterfalls excursion. but when i bought my new Oakleys monster dog, i kinda forgot to ask for polarised lenses. so i called up the store i got it from and asked if there was anyway around this, besides purchasing just a new pair of polarised lenses which would have set me back about RM408.. JUST FOR THE LENSES..  anyway the store said they’ll enquire for me and get back to me in 2 days.

the day after that, they called me up and told me that they’ll get me a new pair with the lenses and all i had to do was pay the difference which added up to RM150. all in all, i think that pretty much justifies the whole reason why i only choose to buy oakleys instead of shelling out rm200 a different brand and get no after sales service later on.

On another note, my mate Arvind will be leaving for Kuantan in a few hours, he’s been posted at a hospital there or something. we definitely went through some good times together. from high school, playing in the same hockey team, playing pool and so on and so forth. really hope that he does well over there.. but then again i don’t think i have to worry much, after all he is a doctor.. $$$ rich… hahaha

sometime interesting popped up during our conversation earlier on.. another mate of mine mentioned that he has got a friend with a indian father, and a chinese mother.. but he was classified as MALAY.. what the fuck!? we were all shocked and later on he went on to tell us that both his parents are of the muslim faith. but what the hell??? how can a person have a chinese mother and an indian father but be called malay? i guess this is another case whereby, religion and race are intertwined. heh.. weird… but then again.. since he’s malay on paper, i suppose he gets the whole bumiputra status and stuff.. lol

it’s been such and eventful week… started off with having a horrible time at work, then a short break for the trip to the Chamang Waterfalls and elephant santuary in pahang along with the noobs (I’ll write about it soon because right now i’ve got sore arms). and the day after that i was feeling all lethargic and tired, i decided to go to my regular clinic to have a check-up. which was when my world turned upside down. apparently the doctor suspects i might either have diabetes or some thyroid disorder. i freaked out…. because my grandad had heart problems, my auntie died from diabetes and well.. my family’s got history of ILLNESSES… the doctor adviced me to eat right and stay in shape.. blood results aren’t out yet. but hell, even if its good new i don’t think it’ll hurt to do what she suggested.

then things started to get a little better for me. my company had a quarterly review meeting the other day. and that’s when people voice out their challenges the face, and solutions in order to achieve better results in the next quarter. i was just sitting there listening, up till the part where they announced the quarterly achievement award or something like that. i was pretty shocked to see the 4 alphabets on the rear projection screen.

A D R Y

i was like eh? i deserve this meh? but i only worked here for several months… 10??? 11 months?? how can i get? got so many other people working harder then me! then my boss spoke a little about me.. saying how at times i had to work late in the office, till almost having to sleepover to finish some proposals. or how i had to bring work home to get them done.

I WAS TEARY EYED OKAY! i mean i’ve worked late in my previous jobs, worked till the wee hours in the morning to finish projects as well… but this is the first time someone was actually praising me for the effort i put in. and when they asked me to say a few words… i had to decline, saying..

“i cannot talk leh.. i shy… and i think if i talk.. i scare u all see me cry but thank you thank you thank you…”

i think would have cried if i spoke.. seriously never felt appreciated like this before.. damn malu wei…

the rest of the night.. i was just in shock, and a smile was chiselled on my face. i definitely slept well then..

lol that’s all for now.. i wish i could dramatise this post more..but i can’t.

it’s definitely not the first time i’m writing about it, and indeed, it probably won’t be the last time. once again, i shall press on the fact that i have a certain afinity for old things. i keep junk (literally). hell, i even kept my dad’s italian three spoke steering wheel from his car. and it was OLD, i must have kept it since i was 5 or something. with the thoughts that i wanted to install it on the first car i own. but guess what, someone threw it away without letting me know. i still enjoy knowing that my grandfathers slide projector is still in the cupboard downstairs, even though the slides of my grandad probably can’t be used anymore. i have no recollection of him talking to me you see.. he died when i was merely five. and the last thing i remember of him was looking at in his vegetative state on the hospital bed, and how i managed to stick my head between the rails of the balcony at the hospital. but with the help of the nurses and some vaseline, my head poped out from the gap.. heh

i’ve dreamt of you ever since i was 16. riding my bicycle around ss14 and i saw you. it was definitely love at first sight. friends who saw me never would understand how i could just stand there and appreciate how you looked, even with all the rust and damage. i still thought that you were beautiful. i vowed to myself that one day i’ll own something like you, but just maybe thats a dream that may never be fulfilled. i don’t know much about cars an how they work.. hehe i’m no grease monkey ok..

things back then were just made with so much more ‘feel’. i’d rather be seen driving this old car compared to be seen in any other modern days sports car. who the hell needs to be traveling at break neck speed when they could be cruising around in style. some has made remarks that i’m dumb to want somethign THAT old. older then me even. 26 years old and yet still a beauty. now thats what i call design.

amongst others that i would really love to have one day..

a fiat 128 rallye

Datsun 510

ok i’m nuts.. and i don’t know anything else to write about. and i’ve been writing about cars in succession. but i couldn’t keep myself from writing when i saw the pictures online..

she left me on the 30th April this year, and the best part is i didn’t even get to say good bye. in fact, all i got was a phone call notifying me that she has left for good, gone off with another man to spend the rest of her life with.

i didn’t think much of it at first. i told myself that i could see it coming, and it was about time that she left me and made another person happy. I remember the first day i met her way back in 2001. And i can’t believe that she stood by me for the whole 7 years? i wasn’t really impressed with what i saw, i couldn’t imagine myself being with her at all, but i needed her as i didn’t have anything else. She definitely served me well, even though sometimes i got odd stares from people when i’m out with her.

It was 2001, and for the first few weeks, my family and i were often in a heated discussion because i told them that i wanted to get a suzuki FXR to ride to class. they kept telling me it wasn’t safe to ride a bike to school, whereas I on the other hand insisted it was fine, as i was already riding my mountain bike to class from subang to kelana jaya everyday. secretly, i wanted the fxr because i didn’t want to burden my parents by asking for anything else more expansive.

so that friday morning, i followed my dad to Sg. Buloh before class. We walked in to an empty lot and there she was, shiny and in my favourite colour, RED. my dad told me that he was going to buy me a kancil. i cringed at that thought. i once vowed to myself that i wouldn’t drive a kancil, just like how i would never ever ever ever ever drive a honda… any honda. but what could i have said? she was a 1995, a six year old car and we bought it for 13 thousand. in my heart, i felt a little weird and overjoyed. weird because i felt like a giant in such a small vehicle, overjoyed because i finally had my own car. i reached college and my face was beaming with joy.

months later, i saved enough cash and fitted her out with a cd player. then later on came the subwoofer and amplifier… she was definitely the loudest car i’ve been in. utter joy when i cruised down the streets, i couldn’t care less about what people thought of me when they say me with my windows down smoking a cigarette listening to No Doubts Hellagood or Eurhythmics Sweets Dreams on the radio. it was that year that i got involved in South Saturn Delta. And she became the official bandwagon. She took us everywhere, racing from LUCCT in Kelana Jaya on thursday nights to play at Waikiki, took us to Sri Damansara to the jamming studio, heck, once i even raced through the streets of old klang road heading towards PJ to withdraw cash in the wee hours of the morning because a friend of mine urgently needed cash as he got in trouble with some loan sharks. those where the days when i really enjoyed driving her, with her stiffened and lowered suspension. bliss.. i even remember using her to ferry around a mahjong table when the lan dou kuais (jeslyn, jerome, kee eng and I) wanted to play mahjong after class.

for my final year in college she served me even better. I ripped out the front and rear passenger seats to fit in the table i made for my project. i even got pulled over by the cops and got questioned about why i was overloading her.

“Encik, saya belajar lagi. Ini project saya (pointing at the table). takda kete lain nak pakai yang boleh muat meja ni.. nak sewa van pun takde duit”

i guess he couldn’t see a fault in it, and he let me off without a fine or anything.

but few years down, i began to neglect her i suppose. there were times when i was so broke, she ran out of gas a few times. me and my mates had to walk to a petrol station to fill a bottle with gasoline and drive her back. sometimes i got a little fed up. I kept taking her to the workshop and yet when she was out, another problem occurred. but what hurt me the most was to see that her paint was fading. from a deep red to a pale pink. but then again, it just cost too much to give her a new coat.

i called rueben the other night, told him that she’s gone. sold her to some other guy that wanted to give her a new turbo-ed heart.

“what the hell!! you sold your kancil? ah.. i’m gonna miss it. now that you mentioned it, i remember you car had this certain smell”

“What smell??” i asked

“yeah your car had the cigarettes mixed with some air freshener smell.. i’m sure going to miss it. aww man.. but your car really served you well man… driving to gigs and all that.. now we don’t have a bandwagon anymore”

“dude, stop talking like that lah… actually i’m starting to miss it also.. even though i used to complain about it all the time.. haih.. i guess i never really realised what kind of companion she was eh?”

and that was that. nowadays, i wake up from sleep, open the front get to leave for work. and she’s not there in her usual spot. no more red kancil with the www.foosball.com sticker at the back. no more red kancil with the FRAGILE sticker that rueben stuck on the rear. no more read  red kancil with the faded pink roof and right fender. my only hope is that your new owner appreciates you more then i did, even with the new L200 turbo engine which he plans to put in you. i don’t even have a picture of you to emo about

lately i’ve been trying to play the guitar again, and if you probably seen the video i posted in the previous post, you’d agree that i can’t play the guitar and sing for nuts. heck… i don’t even know chords. but i shall try. the song that currently plays on my WMP everyday now happens to be The Space Between - by Dave Matthews Band . maybe the song has a slight significants to what i’m thinking about now, maybe it doesn’t but above it all its still a great listen. I’ve always been a fan of his songs and his voice. i guess one day i shall attempt to play the acoustic version of that song.

i guess i kinda miss my good friends who are currently in perth at the moment. they’re working there, not studying. haven’t seen them in months. i really do miss the times we used to spend in the jamming studio with all the arguments and what not. I remember when we were all still studying in limkokwing, kelana jaya. and played every thursday at waikiki. I’d have to rush out after autocad class which ended at 10pm and drive to Waikiki. We were newbies in the pub scene but we still tried our best to put on a good show. just me on vocals and my mate rueben on guitars. and later on jason raj joined in to play bass and that was how south saturn delta was created.

though there were many disputes between us, i think South Saturn Delta was probably the best band i’ve ever been in. with the raw talent of Mr Rueben John on guitars and the fantastic groovy sounds on bass by mr Jason Raj. More often then not, i felt as if i was letting the band down because i found myself unable to keep up with their level.

we still get together once a year to play and have fun. i get a certain kind of high when making music with the two of them. and i can barely wait till i have the chance to jam with them again.

before i sign off today, i’ll leave you with a sound check recording that South Saturn Delta made in the beginning of the year with Vishnu Byron Joseet on vocals, Rueben John Joseet on  Guitars, Jason Raj on Bass, and adry azad on the Harmonica. I might warn you that what we are playing in the recording isn’t even a song, but more like us just having fun, no lyrics no fixed rifts and no parts. we just ‘hantam’ everything. as for me, i think it was actually the first time i really played the harmonica to a song since i only started playing the harmonica a few weeks (months?) before.

Click here : South Saturn Delta

*i don’t know why but my myspace seems to come up in some foreign language… haha

watch and have a laugh. i can’t really play the guitar. ok maybe, i can’t play the guitar at all. but i was bored and i decided to do it anyway, but i’de prefer to have someone play the rhythm for me. any guitarists around? hehe

*don’t watch if you don’t want your ears to bleed

“when i grow up i want to be a pilot”

“karang bila aku dah besor aku nak jadik juruterbang”

perut aku besor siut.. dah start nampak macam kaki botol, padahal aku tak minum, untuk pengetahuan anda, orang india panggil kaki botol ‘kudhi karan kupe’.. cis, buncit betul. member aku cakap perut aku buncit pasal aku minum banyak sangat air. aku tak tau la sama ada apa yang dia kata tu betul ke tak. malas aku nak dok pikir. jiwa aku tak cukup tenteram skarang untuk pikir pasal benda cam tuh. nak meletup rasanya kepala aku. ISHK!!! angle gambo ni buat aku nampak pendek la. tapi.. aku memang pendek.. hehe

okay.. obviously thats no flight suit, and obviously i don’t even have the physique to be mistaken as one (hopefully that will change soon..heh). just got back from site (of which i shalln’t disclose the location) a few hours ago. and i’m not really in a very good place mentally at the moment. my thoughts are mostly out of sync. there’s still alot to do. i probably smoked more then 2 packs a day in the past few days, and thats a hard to reach number since we aren’t allowed to smoke on the premises. there were so many questions that i could not answer and some many decisions that i could not make. i only wish what i have said there and then were the right words to have been spoken. and i also hope that i don’t land in the hot seat in the next coming days.

looking at my picture i suddenly think of what it would have been like if i was a pilot instead. i’ve seen planes taking-off up close, and every time the landing gear lifts off the ground, i find myself awestruck-ed. how can something so hefty and huge fly off so gently as if weightless in to space? yes, i’m amazed by the feats of people, and appreciate the laws of physics, but in that moment, i feel that there definately a supreme being looking down on us. okay, that was pretty unrelated, but hell i just feel like writing.

we stayed in a resort by the sea, a little run down but, it wasn’t all that bad either. had some awesome food. for two nights straight i had tom yam and rice. yeah, i love rice, perhaps thats why i’m just THAT fat anyhow. i got a parking fine while stopping at a hardware store to buy some supplies. i didn’t know that i needed to use parking coupons on a saturday in that state. bah.. such luck. to make matters worse, someone tried prying into my car boot. if found out after trying to open the boot with my car keys and all i managed to do was spin the lock in place, and the next thing i knew, the lock just popped out of the hole. thank god, they didn’t take anything, perhaps we walked to the car in the nick of time, as my colleagues and I saw a duo walking away from the car when we appeared.

oh, and i think i got a speeding ticket. haha. i was trying to chase down this toyota hatchback on the highway while heading home. i’ve never seen that model here in Malaysia before, and the dude was driving pretty fast. when i finally got beside him, i glanced to the right and saw the policeman pointing his radar gun at me. SIEN.

right now i wish i could whisk her away to somewhere quiet and lay beside her and do nothing, just enjoy the company. thats what i want, but just like what the rolling stones sang..”you can’t always get what you want”.

while i was out of town, i thought about writing about semantics (read design semantics), but i can’t seem to recall the example that i wanted to use.

as of 2220hrs tuesday wednesday night, adryazad shall leave Malaysia and head to Bangkok for a long awaited holiday. A well needed break from the computer, internet and people i suppose. I don’t know what to expect whilst there, but since i’ll be traveling with ky and terenceg, i would say that i can expect some good times. hehe. anyway i still got tonnes of things to prepare. Hope my next post will bare the fruits of our adventure. till then, see you on the 9th of april!